The Awakening was about six months ago. Not a huge fan of it. I preferred not having to buy fireball-proof windows from the half-baked mad scientist down the block. I’m pretty sure they spy on me. All I have to show for it are some pointed ears and a few more inches of height. The guy across the street got laser eyes. Still won’t pay to fix the holes he made in my walls. That’s a sweet gig. You can do something with eye lasers. Me? I have to go back to work tomorrow and feel my enhanced eyes straining at the same low-res monitor that was just fine, thank you before this. The gnome the next cube over always wants to feel my ears for “good luck”. They haven’t been lucky for me.

“You should try out for archery.” She says. “I bet you’d be good at it.”

I think she’d be good at standing in a garden, but I don’t tell her that. She’s trying to make the best of it. It’s not easy when she can’t reach the keyboard.

Janice in accounting got to be a damn dragon. She carved out a whole floor to herself. Still collects a paycheck and everything, and all she does is sleep on her big pile of computers. I wish I could threaten to burn the place down. I’d even do it. Janice won’t. She didn’t go any farther than being a bean counter- she doesn’t have the initiative to burn a building down. Then again, I haven’t been promoted in years. Ever since the boss lost a couple feet and started braiding his huge beard, he doesn’t want to part with a dime more than he has to. I’m pretty sure he’d rather use his hammer.

The future sucks.